Thursday, November 02, 2006
We don't have time to stop and stare
So, here’s something about me: I’m an anxious person. I am my own worse enemy, I create anxiety for myself. Everything has to be perfect, I have to please everyone, I have to feel that everything I do is 'worth' something, I have to fight against the nasty things in the world, I have to throw myself into everything I do hammer and tonge and what's more get it right. I stress about stressing too much. It's very exhausting all this stressing. But wherever I go there are stressed people too, people ranting and raving, people lost in the depths of their own problems, people rushing around, not taking time just to look quietly at the world around them. We feed off eachother, stressed people. A few weeks ago I blogged about my trip to the Lake District and how it took so little to make me feel peaceful, a bit of water, a few trees and sheep, hot tea and silence. That's all that was needed. And now after two weeks back in the hustle and bustle of noisy modern-day life I feel the stress. It doesn't have to be like this, I want to compartmentalise my life and not let bits bleed into one another, I want to take time to just be still and enjoy the world and the people I love. May be this is one of the reasons I like taking pictures. The shutter is clicked. The flash goes off and I've stopped time, as if just for the blink of an eye. The world is captured at that very instant, still forever.